Get Smurfed!

Dear Bolton Carley,

I have a grumpy wife.  I love her, but she’s grumpy.  How do I magically make her happy again?

Happy Smurf

Dear Happy Smurf,

I ‘spose I should first say:  you’re not alone.  My husband has one of those, too!  And there’s probably about a billion other guys right there with you.  And well, “magically” making her happy?  Good luck!

However, I would generally guess that most wives may not be so unhappy with you as unhappy with life, and quite honestly, she may not even realize it or know why.  I completely blame hormones, but I don’t really think this a matter of blame so much as a problem needing solved. 

You wanna a cheery, happy wife?  I highly recommend your first stop is the dishwasher.  Unload or load.  I guarantee she’ll be thrilled.  Have supper on the table or clean the bathroom and she’ll remember why she married you.  And even if work sucks, her sister won a trip to New York City, or her best friend ditched her to go shopping with the new boss, she’ll brush it aside because you did something out of the ordinary to show you love her.  And yes, you probably show her that in 5000 ways every day, but it’s the one thing that you don’t usually do that we notice.  It’s much like us going braless or wearing mascara when we don’t normally:  it gets your fire burning.  We just get hot over your domestic abilities and extra efforts.  What can I say?  It may not be right, but I promise results.

Bottom line:  Smurfette was blond, spoiled, and happy.  Smurf to it, my friend.  You know what to do.

Sincerely,

bc